The East Texas Germ Warfare Standard Deviation (Where Can I Get A Surrogate Brain?) Biological Flu Blues

By Jolie Blond

I’d gotten to feeling sophisticated,
secure in myself,


and then I learned humility
when brought down
by a bug.

The bug has got a hold of me,
the doctors cannot kill it.
My brain won’t work,
my nose won’t stop,
my throat burns like
a cheap, worn skillet.

I tried my mom’s herbology,
I starved and stuffed and pilled it.
When whiskey failed
to do its stuff,
I hot tub tried
to cook it out

As strong
and wise
and educated
as I had gotten to be,
I couldn’t even defend myself
from this tiny viral flea.

So if you’re feeling superior
to the day’s circumstantial turns,
just remember all your best laid plans
can be altered by a germ

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