Okay, I will post an update in as few words as possible…
Deer ran into my car.
Got a new car. Barcelona Red Metallic Toyota Corolla, 2012…
Quit my job to look after my mother full time.
Managed to post without deleting the fucking thing.
October 31, 2012 at 9:31 am (F&#*%@ing)
I just spent half an hour writing a post on this fucking laptop and accidentally hit a key (I have no idea what the “magic” key IS) and lost the entire fucking post. AND WordPress didn’t save the damn draft! No wonder I haven’t been posting in months. My PC is fucked and I haven’t been able to get anything loaded on my new PC and I HATE laptop keys. I keep hitting SOMETHING that causes me to go back a page when I don’t want to (why I lost the post earlier) or a key that pops me back up a line or two and I end up typing over what I typed before. In fact, I hate using laptops altogether. HATE!
I have been using my iPhone for everything and just don’t want to bother with the frustration of posting.
A lot has been going on and I really have wanted to share it but I am not even going to bother.
Why 1) does WordPress log me off every day or so even when I ask to remain logged in 2) why do I have to enter the same password 5 times to actually log-in. even when the password is correct? Stupidity!
Yesterday, I bought a laptop, partially so that I could be able to make use of the tool I bought for Mom to assist with her memory. The Vicon Revue is a device designed for people with memory disorders to assist them with cognitive function. It takes photos throughout the day and enables them to review the images to refresh their memory or to assist in therapy designed to enhance or restore memory function
I was having great difficulty in getting the images to download to my computer and having them on my computer was problematic because Mom would have to come upstairs to view them.
So I was able to install the software to the computer and to be able to download the images from the camera to the laptop.
Then, part way through the evening, the touchpad on the laptop ceased functioning properly. I can move the pointer but not click or double click on an icon. I can click enter and access an application but not being able to make use of the touchpad properly is a pain. I have installed my wireless mouse but that means I have to use my laptop on a surface which will allow me to use them mouse… not on my lap.
I checked the drivers, located a button which turns the touchpad on and off, and finally sent in a support request.
It is annoying but I know that it MUST be something I pressed not a fault with the computer. But also annoying because I can’t figure it out on my own.
April 25, 2012 at 12:41 pm (Suicide)
Again I am wishing I just didn’t have to wake up.
Why can’t I just find myself in that place inside myself that most everybody is able to find themselves? Or why can’t I just let everything go? If it weren’t for Mom I just wouldn’t bother even trying.
Fact is. I just want to let go and finally find some peace.
The Laughing Heart
by Charles Bukowski
your life is your life
don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is a light somewhere.
it may not be much light but
it beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you chances.
you can’t beat death but
you can beat death in life, sometimes.
and the more often you learn to do it,
the more light there will be.
your life is your life.
know it while you have it.
you are marvelous
the gods wait to delight
So… We were at the chiropractors and we came down, I put Mom in the car and went to put the wheelchair in the trunk. I put it in, closed the lid. I went to get my keys and discovered that they were most probably in the trunk. My spares were at home… To get in the house, I needed the house key which was in the trunk… You can’t get into the trunk by flipping the seat down. The only option was to call CAA, get a tow to my mechanic and hope he can get it unlocked. When I called him he told me it would be expensive and require a day to do. The option was to get it towed home, get a house locksmith in to pick the front door lock and get my spare… So I called CAA and changed the tow to my house. It would be 45 minutes for the tow truck.
So then, I decided to kill time by posting my dilemma on FB … I got as far as “This is the first time in ages that the car trunk has opened easily with the key… without… having… to … lift… the… floor… latch…”
Yep… I completely forgot the floor latch… D’oh..
Well… There is a turn of events…
As I have mentioned, changes to the mandate for the government department meant that contact requirements had changed. I was being asked for the new contact to work exclusively on-site, for fewer hours, and pay for parking daily. Due to my family commitments I simply cannot work away from home. I turned it down. As of April 1, I was out of work and feeling fine with that.
Fifteen minutes ago, I got a call from the HR person for the company I work at. “Someone in high places has been putting a good word in for you!” they asked if I was able to work at home would I be inteKrested in a new contract…
I said yes on the spot. I still have to hear the terms but even if it means fewer hours per week, I am interested.
I was looking forward to being with Mom full-time but being able to put more money aside for the time when I really do have to stop working will be better than simply stopping now.
It’s weird, too, because I ran into someone who looked familiar. My grand-nephew is staying with her and her husband. Turns out that she works for the same department as I do in a slightly higher level. She told me that, rather than the Department’s mandate ending in March 2013, there is 7-9 years work left…. Hmmmm….